Here we go again~

I throw all of your stuff away
I’m gonna clear you out of my head
I tear you out of my heart
And ignore all your messages
I tell everyone we are through
'Cause I'm so much better without you
But it’s just another pretty lie
'Cause I break down
Every time you come around
O Oh O Oh

So how did you get here under my skin?
I swore that I'd never let you back in
Should have known better in trying to let you go
'Cause here we go go go again
Hard as I try I know I can't quit
Something about you
is so addictive
We're falling together
you'd think that by now I'd know
cause here we go go go again

You never know what you want
And you never say what you mean
But I start to go insane
Every time that you look at me
You only hear half of what I say
And you're always showing up too late
And I know that I should say goodbye
But it's no use
Can't be with or without you
O Oh O Oh

So how did you get hereunder my skin?
I swore that I'd never let you back in
Should have known better in trying to let you go
[ Demi Lovato Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ] 
Cause here we go go go again
Hard as I try I know I can't quit
Something about you is so addictive
We're falling together you’d think that by now I'd know
Cause here we go go go again
And again, and again, and again, and again, and again
I threw all of your stuff away
And I cleared you out of my head
And I tore you out of my heart
O oh o oh, o oh o oh

So how did you get here under my skin?
I swore that I'd never let you back in
Should have known better in trying to let you go
Cause here we go go go again
Hard as I try I know I can't quit
Something about you is so addictive
We're falling together you'd think that by now I'd know
Cause here we go go here we go again
Here we go again 
Should have known better in trying to let you go
'Cause here we go go go again

Again (and again, and again)
Again (and again, and again)
And again 
And again 
And again 
...

The moment i heard this lyrics.. i knew that it said exactly wat i feel.. i threw everything away.. i told everyone i'm ok... but thn everytime he starts or just even stands infront of him.. i just melt n die down... y is it so hard?!!!??? Doesn't he know how i feel???!!!! i rather him not telling me how much he misses n loved me so i could at least love him under cover... Now.. look at wat u have done! nice going dude! 

Memories~

ya.. so he came over.. i still have more but.. i don i wanna upload them here.. kinda.. reminds me wat i did the day i sent him off to the airport... well he doesn't know that... no one knows wat happened actually... thought kicking him back home.. i would feel free n would be able to focus on my exams, but thn... yeah that's wat he does best doesn't he? destroys my mood for studying... 

felt a sudden feeling of loneliness the day he flew home. didn't knew y, but i actually cried in the shower.. ate lk half the box of ice cream he left back for me and all the chips up... still.. no study mood... 

why is it so hard to fall out of love? the moment i saw him touching down on mel i knew that the feeling would come back all over again... i just lied to myself.. saying.. he's a bastered.. get rid off him.. n whn i finally did... well... everything came back ... lk the moment he told me he didn't want to fall in love right just yet.. the aching in my heart.... 

we all know its not worth it to cry over such nonsense but who could resists the feeling? i used to chase him in college, tried to get rid of him after college, got together in such a far place n now.... how the hell could u get rid of him forever?? just by deleting him off every pg in ur pc doesn't really helps... trying to tell urself that other guys are way much better thn him doesn't helps, try telling urself u are way much better by urself doesn't helps either. 

its abovious i'm trying to get away from him.. as i don even bother to talk to him in msn... i don want that feeling to come back all over again. but just thinking of getting rid of that feeling.. makes u fall back into that dark hole. 

And after reading denise blog.. sometimes.. i wonder y do guys treat us girls so badly... u know we love u with all our heart, we never will go out for some other guy, we just wanna be with u.. that's all... that's all we ask for... for u to notice how much effort we are trying to put to make things work out between us, n u guys come in.. n just one word destroys it all..... 

so is it worth it? to fall in love after all??? or is it just me?? wanting someone to be by my side for all times.. someone who i can really cry onto whn ever i feel lonely or sad... u know.. maybe having 2012 ... the end of the world isn't such a bad idea after all... at least all those  bustards get wash away into the sea!!! 

After test BREAK!!

Tina text me yesterday.. asking me to go out for a movie!! who would reject such an irresistible offer?? 

So we headed off at 2pm.. right after her meeting... and bought tickets for the 5.40 show of 2012. So.. since we had more thn 2 hours of free time in our hands.. we decided to walk around the city,find lunch, thn only head back off for the movie.. 

Tina told me that myers had this christmas window display which was fabulous! A must see.. so we headed of to myers and ... well actually we kinda walk around n around myers just to find that display window... and wow weee!! Just like wat she said!! it was Fabulous! too bad i didn't had a video recorder with me.. put still i manage to take some pics of the display! Cute !!! 

The story featured in the window was "Olivia helps out for christmas!" the whole thing was kinda lk a story book that came to live! a total of 6 windows... with robotics feature of Olivia the pig and her family.. getting ready for christmas. They even had a narrator in it! Exactly as wat u would get on TV! only.. its right infront of u!! in a shop display window!! How cool was that??

for more pics.. u guys can visit my facebook.. i've uploaded the whole story there.. LOL!

after that.. we headed off to find lunch.. and wow.. we accidently stepped into china town! LOL!!! we had thai food for lunch.. tom yum tasted great! just lk wat we have back home! ah.. yes... 

And after that.. we went on window shopping, walked into a choc shop which started selling cute Christmas chocs! felt lk buying some home but the price was too expensive~ maybe i might buy one.. or two home... hmm 

chocolates!! 

Anyway.. about 2012.. GREAT SHOW! effects were AWSOME!!! have u ever seen every great structure of the world collapse?? Awesome show.. and just thinking about me crying nearly every part where one family had to die~ how people gave up their lives for others.. how family is so important.. I should say it was one of the best shows i've ever seen this year!! Touching, yet exciting and funny... 

Nice show!! 

I miss my family~ but anyway.. i'm almost coming home!! WAIT FOR ME GUYS! ^^

EXAMS AND FREEDOM!

So.. didn't study well during the study break.. the weather was hot.. my mood was down.. and.. yeah... was only concentrating on phy... (i hope i pass!!!) 

so.. exams time table was lk.. back to back.. monday tuesday wednesday... STRAIGHT!! no break in between or nothing! so lucky that we were allowed to bring notes in for maths.. and as for chem everything was mcq... for phy?? well first of al.. we got to wait out in the hot sun... and once we were in the exam hall... my goodness.. my place was like right under the aircond or something.. and worst thing was.. almost every question was exactly the same as the book had!!! i was so happy during reading time!!! thinking.. yeah.. i should be able to solve all!!.. n thn... SHITzzz!!! i can't!!!! ARGH!! wat the hell is wrong with my brain??!!!! 

so now.. since everything is over.. i m just hopping to pass.. no C no D or HD.. just P!!!! pls let me get a P!!! 

So.. going to fly home on the 5th of dec.. wonder if there's any surprise waiting for me?? LOL!!! I miss u guys so MUCH!!!! i really do!!! wait for me guys!! i'm coming home!!! 

Visitor in mel~

Alrite, so its kinda long since my last update... and well quite a lot of things happened during this time.... rite thn... i'll try putting it all into one blog~  

First of all, someone dropped by melbourne before returning home to penang. yeah its HIM~ needed to leave tassie earlier as his grandma was sick and so dropped by melbourne for about 5 days before leaving home.. 

4/11 (wed) 

Night time, me... not knowing how to get to the airport by bus, and HE.. not wanting to come here alone by taxi.... so ended up, i pulled my friend out with me... we took the bus to the airport as a taxi would cost lk aud75.... EXPENSIVE MAN!!! so we picked him up... and..... well did stupid stuff like changing trains.. walking here and there.. taking him on his first sight of MEL b4 heading home. and guys.. i had class the next morning... so.. haiz..

5/11 (thurs)

Didn't sleep well as i SACRIFICED my pillow for him to sleep on.. (at least he slept on the floor) so by the time he woke me up.. it was 10am. N hell ya.. i missed one lect@@ anyway.. got up, got dressed, and kicked him off to my friend as i went off to my last lect of chem... a boring lect indeed... lucky kylyn was accompanying me through sms.. 

After the lect, we went out to the city to have lunch. And My friend.. well he didn't know the way to china town.. so we nearly got lost, and ate in a very unsatisfying chinese restaurant. Food looked good.. but tasted bad. Anyway.. after that .. we walked around the city, till my legs nearly fell out as i was wearing heels that day, and by the time we got home.. it was.... 5pm!!!! so we got home.. he wiped up a sandwich for me as dinner and we went down to my friends room to watch a movie... and... HE FORCED MY TO DRINK CHAMPAGNE! on a night where i had a 8.30am class the next morning!!! i nearly died that nite.. whole face blotted up lk a balloon!! 

6/11(fri)

hell yea.. skipped my lect..one reason was the drink and another was for the internet.. stupid internet!! i just wanted to renew my account and pop!! it came charging me with 2!!  went for the tutorial instead.. felt so sorry for john as i missed is lect so many times!! including this last one!!! so rushed of for tut... and well.. xiao jin n i wanted to know where the exam venue (FESTIVE HALL) was.. so we begged nic to take us out. He... not ans my phone or sms... so i thought he was out having fun with my other friend.. and well.. nearly towards the end of my lect, he called me.. asking me not to go.. = ="" wel i had no choice but to ask him to follow us to festive hall ... have a sight seeing of the place.. 

we didn't exactly found the location, but we found the road.. and on the way back.. he wanted to go to the musuem!! now who the hell put that idea in his head??!!! anyway.. cause me n nic wanted to watch a movie from teh very begining.. we headed off to mel central.. n jin.. well she left for home after that.. (had bbq party) ... we reached mel central.. n bad thing.. all shows started at 9pm.. n nic.. he wanted to be back home at that time.. so.. no movie.. 

instead.. i took him walking around prahan .... and after that. we had dinner at home.. (petaling st) man was i tired!!! 

7/11(sat) 

he really wanted to go to the museum!! wat was i suppose to do?? anyway.. i mapped my way there and yeah, took him to the museum~ he was so happy there... i think.. just taking pics and... to my surprise.. they had a section on just HUMANS!!! yeah.. teaches u about the human body and parts and muscles anda section where u can't take photos!!!! EXACTLY!! they even have a SEX EDUCATION section!! with videos of a women give birth!!! oh well.. we did had fun.. walked till the museum closed.. and did i say the whole thing was FOC??!! LOL!! 

8/11(sun) 

Hot sunny day.. com'on its a sunday.. where would u wanna go?? there's no where to go on a sunday now is there??? so we just stayed home.. doing laundry.. and HE~ couldn't stand the heat so wat happened was he went off buying a table fan for me!!! and ice cream as well!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!!! 

9/11 (mon)

woke up at 5.30am... just to get ready to send him off to the airport.. thank god it was my study break!!! sent him off... and.. well yeah. i had to come home to study but thn... i was so sleepy!!! i slept the whole day instead... @@ 

Someone's coming!!

WOW... long time nothing has happen to me right?? well of cause.. being a free bird... what's there to complain about??? ^^ 

anyway.. one person's dropping by soon~ who u ask??? well.. all i can say is SOME ONE!! yeah~ terrible terrible terrible.. how can some one drop by to visit n expect to have fun whn i have so much to handle???!! esspecially whn all my test are coming soon???!!! n whn i have a feeling i will actually fail EVERYTHING??!!!! shit!! i hate this man..... 

never see good luck coming from that person.. is always bad luck.. well guess wat.. since i'm so busy.. is either he follow me go busy around.. or stuck get lock up in my room... YEAH!! that's such a nice plan don u think???? MUAX TO ME!! HOW I LOVE MYSELF!! = =""""